Black People Can Tan!

Vacation!!!!

This vacation was definitely needed. Having drama occur in your life against your will is annoying. Speaking of, if you are anyone's ex and did them absolutely dirty and has your dirty laundry aired on the internet, I suggest you NOT speak with your ex's friends. Seriously what the fuck are you thinking? Soccer hottie got mad at me for telling her this one piece of information because she is tired of him and has an immense amount of contempt for him, so I am letting it out on here.

I got a text from one of my classmates saying, "your scadalous ex came up to me in BWW...wanted to see how things are going." Now at this point if this dick wad ever came up to one my good friends with this bullshit they would have given him the stank eye and most likely said, "fuck off!" In fact, had he EVER had the nerve to say something to soccer hottie, I'm sure he would have lost a testicle or two. Obviously being around an idiot makes you an idiot. That is scary. You can get idiot from osmosis?

Goal: only date smart men, because the sheer possibility of catching idiot is frightening!

But no worries. I went on vacation with a good friend and had a great time. Our vacation got off to a rocky start. Belle, (<= her favorite Disney character) drove from Dallas to meet me in good ol' Leesville on Sunday so we could leave Moday afternoon. No big right? Just a normal 5 hour drive that I used to make every weekend. Everything should be smooth sailing especially since she got her oil changed on Satrurday right?!

WRONG

Her oil cap wasnt screwed on correctly so she got to leak oil all day Saturday after the oil change, and the three hour drive to Shreveport on Sunday before her oil light came on.  By the time the oil light comes on I am told it is too late...bye bye engine. So a girl from Washington, who lives in Dallas, is stuck in Shreveport, two hours away from her destination and nearest friend. It's cool guys, I saved her. It all sounds awful, but she couldn't have been stuck in a better place. I spent five years of my life in Shreveport!! I know people! I called my best friend's family to go get here and house her until I could arrive. Then we were smooth sailing...Vacation time!

Knowledge I gathered on Vacation:

8 hours isn't a bad drive when you are with good company

• We took pictures at every state sign!

White people are extra friendly

• We met some wonderful people who were also taking pictures at the state signs heading to Disney World and went to lunch with them when we got to Pensacola. 

The most awesome people we could have met!

White people don't believe in sunscreen

• Getting a sunburn leads to burning which leads to a tan so they would rather put on a low SPF like 6 (what is the point of that?) or none at all for the sake of being closer to my color. I don't know why being red as a lobster and in pain is ok, but then again, I will probably never understand why white people do a lot of shit. 

A sheer sarong. Yep...that is how you protect yourself from the sun

White people think that black people CAN'T tan

• Unlike my white friends, I slather on sunscreen because I have been burned before and hate the feeling. We were so relaxed however, that I did not reapply, not to mention I didn't use any on my upper back because I couldn't reach. When I took pics of my hand, white folks on my Facebook refused to believe it was me even though I said it was. Like who the fuck would lie about that? Ok...I can think of one compulsive lying bitch in my class, but seriously...hands? Why could they not believe it? Because my hands were a lot darker than normal because black people can't tan. ????? I have tan lines where my swim suit was people. It's ok, Ill let the ignorance slide. 

Actively tanning on the beach

My controversial picture

Men love women who have mustaches (see below)

We gained memories, sunburns (yes I got a serious sunburn on my upper back from not applying sunscreen), and friends on our trip. And now all of you know that black people can tan!