Started From the Bottom

Dear Drake,

Stop. Just Stop.

-Me

Happy late Easter yall! I've been meaning to make this post for a while because well...this Drake guy annoys the living piss out of me. There should be a rule as to how many Canadian musicians are allowed out of that country at once. No offense Canada, but Justin Bieber and a Canadian rapper named Drake were the worst ideas ever. I mean, that doesnt even make sense-- Canadian rapper.

Let me be clear. I am not being a "hater." I just don't understand how someone like Drake is starting from the fucking bottom. If you have been living under a rock or you just don't listen to this crap called rap music you have absolutely no freaking clue what I am talking about. Let me bring you up to speed.

<--- That guy is Aubrey Drake Graham

<--- He used to play this wheelchair Jimmy guy on the show Degrassi in his younger days

















He is also to blame for the term YOLO (you only live once...as if I thought I was a fucking cat or something) and for this song:

For those of you who don't want to engage in the Tom foolery above here are the lyrics to the song:

[Chorus]
Started from the bottom now we're here
Started from the bottom now my whole team fucking here Where are we exactly?
Started from the bottom now we're here
Started from the bottom now the whole team here, nigga
Started from the bottom now we're here
Started from the bottom now my whole team here, nigga
Started from the bottom now we're here
Started from the bottom now the whole team fucking here

[Verse 1]
I done kept it real from the jump
Living at my mama's house we'd argue every month I lived at my mom's and argued too. Weird
Nigga, I was trying to get it on my own I'm still trying to get it on my own. I mean I live on my own...
Working all night, traffic on the way home Traffic. Tell me about it #Firstworldproblems
And my uncle calling me like "Where ya at?
I gave you the keys told ya bring it right back" My uncle lives states away so I guess you got me on this one
Now I'm on the road, half a million for a show
And we...

[Chorus]


[Verse 2]
Boys tell stories about the man Are we talking about the people that "are out to get" black people? Were there even slaves in Canada-land?
Say I never struggled, wasn't hungry, yeah, I doubt it, nigga Struggling in Canada is different from struggling here. They owe less money to other countries 
I could turn your boy into the man Dude does magic tricks now
There ain't really much I hear that's poppin' off without us, nigga The party don't start till you walk in? Ke$ha already claimed that
We just want the credit where it's due
I'ma worry about me, give a fuck about you Thats nice
Nigga, just as a reminder to myself
I wear every single chain, even when I'm in the house Do you feel like you are going to be robbed or something?
Cause we...

[Chorus]


[Bridge]
No new niggas, nigga we don't feel that
Fuck a fake friend, where you real friends at? I'm still trying to figure that out
We don't like to do too much explaining Most people don't
Story stays the same I never changed it
No new niggas, nigga we don't feel that
Fuck a fake friend, where you real friends at?
We don't like to do too much explaining
Story stay the same through the money and the fame At least you're consistent
Cause we...

[Chorus]

So what have we learned here? 

1. Drake lived a pretty decent life
• I mean yeah he was raised by a single parent, but who isn't these days?
2. Starting from the bottom in Canada-land is like starting half-way to the top in the states
• being a childhood actor on a popular show as a teenager does not equate starting from the so called bottom
3. If you actually started from the bottom, this song is probably highly offensive
• I'm offended and I only started lower than Drake. Not even close to the bottom

I would like to ask Drake to spend time in an orphanage before he ever utters the words, "started from the bottom" again. I would also like to say that this Easter holiday proved YOLO wrong. I'm pretty sure Jesus rose from the dead and lived more than once. Suck it Drake. Jesus lives =)

A Little Bit of This and a Little Bit of That

As promised here is my post about my furniture re-do.

If you remember, last year I redid a nasty dresser I found in the dumpster and turned it into the beautiful dresser that holds 1/4th of my wardrobe. 

Still pretty!! Don't mind the crap on the floor :/

I am so happy that there is a such thing as a Pinterest because every time something devastating happens, I have a project to make me happy. This project just happen to fall into my lap at the same time my car died...well played baby Jesus!

If you follow my Pinterest you know that I have all these unoriginal ideas to incorporate into my apartment or any future small space. My pinspiration is rather old. I have been searching high and low for a cheap bookcase to turn into a storage bench so that I could have extra seating and...well...storage. I thought Ikea would be my best bet since the pin used the billy bookshelf from the store. To my surprise, Swedish people apparently value their book storage because that shit was kind of expensive. So I gave up looking. 

Pinspiration

Then, one night before the car debacle, I spotted a BIG old wooden entertainment center. I tried retrieving it myself, but alas, it was awkwardly shaped and hard to carry myself. I called in reinforcement and Am Bam helped me get it into my house. 

Gorgeous right? 

So while my car was at the morgue called the mechanic, Blonde Bombshell and I went to the new Wal-mart down the street from my house to grab some supplies. I wasn't sure what I already had at home so we got:

• Paint
• Paintbrushes
• Sand paper
• Paint thinner
• Fabric
• Twin sized mattress pad

Picked out a lovely color and some fun fabric!

First we had to take off those pesky little doors

Caution: Girl with a power drill

Saving these for a later project

Then we sanded

Until we realized that would take forever. So we just skipped to the fun part. Paint!

This is after the first coat. We did two. 

We were literally watching paint dry. So we took on another project:

This is when we finally used the paint thinner

Anyone from Centenary remember these chairs from the dining area in Hardin hall?

College memory revamp! 

Finished project!

Papaya supervised

We then let everything dry overnight...outside. Bad idea. 

Thats bird poop =(

BB took on the feat of making the cushions during her free time so I did some randomness like 

Hang out with puppies

Buy baskets for the bench @ Ross

Go to a Mavs game

Get Gianni Binis for $31.50

Side tracked. Sorry. Back to those cushions!

Dilemma. Trying to figure out how to make a twin size mattress cushion fit on the new bench

Sewing Machine. I need one of those.

Use your centenary education to figure out the dilemma. Two cushions!

Make sure the cushions are comfy

Two finished cushions thanks to the Bombshell!

TA-DA!!

Diamond tested and Papaya approved! 

Boom! New storage bench that is ALLLL me and I only spent $50!! 

Until the next time

Love is in the Air

Appropriately, I want to tell you guys about my new love for my February post since Valentine's day is the theme of this month...or maybe I should tell you about African American history... that's boring. Anyway you need to catch up on my life before I can tell you about either.

First of all let me say Valentine's day is stupid. All of these girls on Facebook saying, "oh isn't he so sweet he got me flowers!" Actually, you'd be pissed if he didn't get you shit. He is just staying out of an argument because for once, he is smart. And really, getting the same shit other people get on the same damn day isn't really special. Get me a gift on a random day because you were thinking of me. Now that's sweet, but you gotta love commercialized holidays.

ANYWAYS

2 weeks ago at movie night I left before the movie ended because I wasn't feeling well. I hopped in my little Honda and turned on the heat.  I was 5 minutes away from my house when my heat all of the sudden went out and started blowing the freezing cold air outside. I kept driving thinking my old car was just being weird, but when I exited I just heard a lot of clanking happening under the hood. I barely made it inside the gate of my apartment complex when I saw smoke coming from the car. I parked my vehicle, took everything out,and walked to my place.

The next day Am Bam came over so we could call AAA and have them tow my car. We sat in the car goofing off while I drank a lot of water, drank kombucha, and took cranberry pills like it was going out of style for what I thought was a UTI. The tow-man finally came and prophesied that the repair to my car was going to be in the $2000 range. We get to my mechanic and drop off the car thinking my radiator was the issue. Amber and I got 10 minutes up the road when my mechanic told me he found the problem and to come back.

My report of findings wasn't good. I needed a new engine because all that smoke was my camshaft melting off from not having enough oil since I had an oil leak. Ugh. I wasn't even up for my oil change yet! I was told that it would be cheaper to replace the engine than to try and fix the camshaft alone. A new engine? After I put in a new transmission last year? With tears in my eyes and confused about what I was going to do, I left to go get a sympathy lunch with Am Bam. 

I caught rides from people and was loaned cars mostly from Canada who was in Canada-land for boards. Without a car that weekend the blonde bombshell kept me entertained with a furniture re-do project that I can't wait to blog about! In the meantime, I kept getting sicker and started having pain in the middle of my back.

Pain aside, Am Bam and I went car shopping the next weekend. It was exhausting going from one place to the next being dissatisfied with the selection I was given for cars under $10,000.
My mom was the money supplier so we skyped all day to look at cars with us. When I finally found the one, things got complicated. Who would have thought it would be so hard to get money from Louisiana to Texas on a Saturday? I ended up having BB buy the car for me on her credit card and pay her back. Of course nothing can be easy when it comes to me!

So yes, I have a new love. He's gorgeous, reliable and is easy to ride (grrrr). I'm completely head over heels with my new car. Hopefully it will bring me nothing but joy instead of all the pain that the Honda gave me. It's been a match made in heaven and I must say I haven't been happier! As for being sick for 3 weeks, well turns out I had a kidney infection. When it rains...

Whoop whoop! Thanks to my friends for helping me and to my super awesome mom who would give her left arm to make sure I'm ok!

New Years: When Will a Southern Belle Learn?

Happy New Years!

2012 was full of lots of adventure and y'all lived vicariously through my blog posts. Although my year started off bloody and broken, it ended happily with me watching one of my best friends marry her best friend (awwwwwwwwe). Thank goodness the events that happen on New Years Eve don't foretell the rest of the year.

This New Years I wanted to stay in my bed and bring in the year by staring at the back of my eyelids. Unfortunately, none of that happened. My personal Canadian and I were convinced to go out to the Grenada Theater to have midnight festivities. I think the Grenada would have been nice. Yea...that's right would have been. 

Blonde Bombshell suggested that I hang out with her and her boyfriend for New Years. His friends were doing a show at the Grenada and it appeared to be a fantastic idea. No one wants to be a 3rd wheel to a party so I decided to suit myself up with a Canadian as a date. That morning afternoon, I rolled out of bed at 4pm to do something with my life. I narrowed my NYE wardrobe down to 3 dresses, classy, LBD, and that sequin panty hose from last year. I sent out several texts with my options and of course sequin panty hose dress won by a longshot. I did my hair, put on a crap load of make-up, and took Kiwi out in preparation for this wonderful night. 

After arriving to Canada's house with numerous shoe options for her feet, I put on some eyelashes and drank a huge glass of water. The key to NOT having hang overs is hydration and vitamin B. We ordered pizza, listened to country music and drank some strong rum and coke. I should have predicited how well the nights plans were going to pan out when I called the blonde bombshell and found out at 8, that her boyfriend was drunk and not ready. At around 9, Canada and I decided we were just going to go over to BB's house and drag them out. 

I got there and was introduced to fine whiskey, beer, and champagne all at once. Now, the reason why we needed to leave in a hurry was because blondie wanted to ride the DART train so we could get completely smashed and not have to drive back. We now know better in retrospect. 

We hopped into the mustang and drove over to the dart station where we were about to miss our train. Canada graciously bought us day passes so we could run like hookers in high heels up 3 flights of stairs. To our dismay and increased heart rates, we missed our train. Another one wasn't coming for 20 minutes so we had to wait cheerfully. Thankfully it wasn't too cold outside. We made the most of this time for photo ops and random conversation with others waiting for the next train.

The next train arrived completely empty which was fantastic because, well, I hate crowds of people. We each got our own seats, conversed, and drank our alcoholic beverages that were contained in water bottles and sonic cups. At one point we had to get off and switch trains which nearly gave me an anxiety attack because there were so many people that could possibly touch me. Canada maneuvered me so that I would be around the least amount of people when she realized that my cute little purse was leaking. That's right, I was spilling rum and coke into my purse, on top of my cash, and on top of the electronics. Sweet baby Jesus must have been looking out for me though, because the electronics were just fine.

Everyone on that train seemed to know something that we didn't know because they ALL got off on one stop. We however, remained on the train and attained seats. BB had already figured out what station we needed to get on so we had to make another train switch. After going through a tunnel downtown, we arrived at a station where we needed to do the switch. At this point BB and her boyfriend are conversing about changing up the plans entirely in which I get frustrated because the damn DART was taking waaaay longer than I had expected. We dangerously (not really, but kinda) crossed over the tracks when they decide to go back to the original plans. So we cross again in which Canada yells that she was getting on the next train with or without us (she was pretty frustrated at this point).

We finally arrive to our destination with not a single person around at 1130ish. At first glance, none of us knew where we were, but then I recognized a shopping center (go figure) that I had been to several times. This unfortunately meant that we were far from our final destination that needed to be walked to in 4.5inch heels. Canada at this moment recognizes that our runner friend is in the comedy club across from us. We walk up the stairs and I was instructed to talk to the man at the front door. I quickly explain our long night and that I just wanted to be somewhere when the clock struck midnight. He said we could be there and those were the only words I needed to hear.

We were all admitted at a discounted price, because let's be real, we weren't going to be there long...got drinks at the bar and waited on the nice gentlemen to set up seats for us. At 1145 we are FINALLY somewhere. Finally. We watch the last few minutes of the show, are handed party favors and rang in the new year with one another. Our other friends joined us once they found us in the club and we took the opportunity for photos.

Afterwards Canada and I refused to get back on that fucking train. Our Parker friends offered us a ride home and we were not declining. BB and her boyfriend did go back on the train as they knew they would be uncomfortable in a 2 door car with 7 other people. We were home by 1am.

The next morning I left Canada's house with mud on my heels, a bruise on my calf, and dollar bills that smelled like rum. I bought groceries with damp rum money by the way and it worked just as well as dry paper smelling money.

BB's boyfriend told her that our adventure probably wasn't fun for the single, non-coupled people. He was right. I would have cared a lot less if I had someone to make out with too (No offense Canada, but that just wasn't happening). Next year, I am following my gut and staying my ass in bed.

PS blame Canada for me not having more pictures...She has the camera...HINT HINT COUGH COUGH